Everyday, I tried, I faught, my heart cried for a keeper. There was never a belief in a word I said, never a belief in my heart, in my love. I see everything replay in my head and I can't believe that everything is now nothing. It was all a lie, you lied when you said you believed, I lied to myself when I thought we could make it. I sit, holding myself... I miss you. I miss being in the presence of what I thought love was. In my eyes I saw hope, a change. I was mislead, I was fooled, all because I refused to let myself down. Your voice no longer eases my mind and allows me to sleep at night, it leaves me wondering what I did wrong this time. Nothing is the same anymore. It is all too familiar to go unrecognized. I know these actions to well for me to not know what is ahead. I'm already in pain, the heartache is already eating me away. I dont know how I feel anymore, if I'm angry its with myself for allowing myself such pain in such short time. There is no answer to my questions but to never go through this again. You give your best and it goes unacknowledged. I faught everyday to show you that I was willing, that I would be able to love you, love you in every way, during your worst and your best but it was never enough. There was nothing I wouldn't do to keep you smiling. I told you to take my heart, take me as a broken child with no way, and together we could make our path, now with my head down, I walk with a heavy heart, and no one to hold my hand. My promises were never enough, I promised you with intentions of showing you what you deserved and still you asked me of your past and asked to be loved. I looked into your eyes begging to be given the chance and my cry went on.... But I still stayed. I became foolish, forgive my heart, for it knew no good and was looking for a ray of hope. I'm sorry that I fell in love with you, in fact I am not sorry because now I know, I know that when a heart is broken the best cure is pain, that's why I failed. I'm sorry for myself, because I was fooled. Foolish me, for giving you my everything....
It kills me the way I fight hard to show you that you can look past all the pain you have suffered but what you notice is every other thing that went wrong in the past. You have held on to all your sorrows and taken it out on me and now I can't take it anymore...
And now that you say I am pushing you away, know that you pushed me away first, you gave my love a blind eye and now its gone, everything has died...
Although I was foolish, I still wish you the best and may the right person love you and you don't let him out of your sight.....
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